Well I cracked. I was all set to be the Le Resistance, but then my students put on the pressure. They know that their English teacher always has all the newest and/or coolest games, and they let me know it. I had no choice but to fall in line. I went back in time to March 3 and bought a Switch and then relived my reality up till now.
*Sigh*
I tried.
Zelda is fun, btw.